Occasionally I will get caught up in a discussion that makes someone raise an eyebrow to my response, or someone finds a modeling pic of mine, or someone friends me on Facebook. And a brief stint comes up and typically gets squashed. So I guess that is a step forward in maturity for me, and a step forward in acceptance for everyone else.
Also I feel like the world is becoming more accepting of their differences, and I feel like it is the best thing ever. And what better place to start than with children?
I just re-read my first post, which is now a very faint memory. But I can still feel the anger and the hurt from that time. I will never understand some fears people have.
I do understand how people can group people into sections based on appearance. If you look like a punk, you must act like a punk in the most extreme way. Yes there are kids with mohawks to get drunk, run around, and fuck shit up. Yes. I know
Yes they get a lot of attention
But what about that chick with a mohawk who has a dream to become president.
I've learned to play the damn game. looking "normal" opens more doors and helps prevent a lot of hurt and fights. People are not instantly defensive around me as much any more.
I am willing to bet most "punks" have a higher IQ on average than all "normal" looking people combined.
You don't become eccentric by chance. You don't question your own existence for fun
You do it because your own existence becomes unbelievable
You find out someday that you no longer feel pain
So you jab needles through every part of loose skin on your body just to "make sure"
And in modern times you don't just jab the needles through and call it done. You stick a ring in it to remind yourself of it.
I know I wasn't the only teen to do that.
And I won't be the last
And you want to know something. Someone like me, or some of my friends. Have come in contact with some of the most bizarre people on this earth. We've had to cope with the absolute truth of life, the concept that your parents are human, the illusions that exist around "the american dream" our whole lives. No wonder we have a different presence, understanding, awareness, and opinion than others. Our experiences shape us.
They make us stronger, but sorry some of us have more scars than others.
But doesn't ANYONE in this world think that maybe, this is all a good thing. This is good for advancements in psychology, sociology, etc.
And Don't you think people like us would really understand kids too?
If the bulk of our trauma happened at an early age. Don't you think a part of our brain is frozen in it?
Yes. I believe so
This is an idea I want to study more. And try to get more information on. But I know I do it. I know I listen to children differently. I also know I am one of the few people that has vivid memories of being a child. VIVID. I mean I can remember details. I can remember feelings. from age 3 on. I even have one memory burned into my subconscious, of my dad leaving when I was 2. It became an ongoing lucid dream that I would have over and over and over every night until he finally came back at age 6.
I remember watching mars attacks with one of my baby sitters, while we hung upside down off the couch. age 3-4.
I am now working with that exact age group. And I know how desperately they are trying to communicate. And how curious they are. And how random they will act. I was the child that decided sliding down an unfinished wood slide would be so fun. Until I got to the bottom and had massive splinters down both legs and up both arms.
why? BECAUSE I WAS 3-4 DAMMIT
ok I think I will end this rant, but I don't like being pushed aside for being "different" because we are all different. Some are just accepted.
People don't use sense when they judge me.
Omg you have a picture of FB of you as a vampire. what would my kid think? DON'T SHOW YOUR KID IF IT BOTHERS YOU. I am not going to go to school like that. But you know, even if I did your kid will accept it before you do. Kids don't have a built in meter like adults do. they don't think "freaks" or "scary" they are just curious. they just want to know why. "Why are your teeth so big?" and its us who tell them. "The better to eat you with!"
honestly we could learn a lot more from kids than they can learn from us
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