So at work we try to enforce good vocabulary skills to reduce the amount of conflict between the children (sounds like something adults should practice right?)
Instead of pushing another child because they took your toy we ask the child to say "not nice" or "no thank you"
Instead of telling a child to get down or sit down etc we ask them "where do your feet go?" And "how do we sit in a chair?"
I like it, it becomes a struggle bc you have to repeat it so many times. Teaching IS much harder than discipline. So to help me make a habit of this I started saying it in every day life. And we all know I spend a lot of time around Jj, so guess who else has made a habit out of it?
It's painfully cute and funny.
"No no Jj, not nice"
Monday, April 22, 2013
Saturday, April 13, 2013
Alternative does not mean BAD
I saw this post and knew instantly who it was. When I was in High School I met a girl who went to the college in town. She was extravagant, over the top, and a little in your face. But I thought she was pretty cool. We rubbed each other the wrong way once while she was leading a BDSM night at the local "hot spot" that I mentored at. So she would routinely kick me out (while I was working on stuff for the place) so she could run the event minor free. Which makes sense, but because of our town she had to be on the down low and couldn't really explain why I had to leave. I just had to leave. So I did.
A few years later I started working as a teacher at the Day Care center I worked part time at in highschool. Guess who else was working there! Yep that same girl. And she was still just as radical. At that point she had a steady boyfriend AND a girlfriend, who would soon be her boyfriend, and went by a mans name. She eventually married the straight dude, and parted ways with her transgendered friend. But that is NOT the story here. The cool thing about her is that she was COMPLETELY open about her "private" life. It wasn't a secret, and the one thing I loved about that place is that my boss at the time, was very open to alternative lifestyles. The facility was tattoo and piercing friendly, we did not have uniforms, and we taught the children to be open minded just by example. Shortly after I started she left to be a dancer in Richmond. We all said goodbye and good luck.
This post is so true because she is the SWEETEST person. She does what she has to do every once in a while, to survive. But shes a sweet person. And people say that about me often. I always get told, or people get told about me that "She is a very cool girl, she is super nice, and friendly but... she is kinda...weird." or " She is a bit strange, but I know you will like her." It is almost as if people have to be prepped for me. (and for this girl)
I do not look as goth as I use to, due to time and wanted the fighting to end. And the harassment. Seriously if you think High School was bad, you have NO IDEA WHAT THE ADULT WORLD IS LIKE. well at least for a goth.
for those of you who are reading this from a non goth view point, goth is not slitting wrists and worshiping satan. there is a much deeper involvement and lifestyle that "classifies" the goth movement. Otherwise do you really think so many people, of all ages, all races, all backrounds, and all religions would be into it? I am sure I will have a blog specifically about being a goth and what it means, but this is not that blog so I am moving on. (if you are a goth, and don't like being classified as such, or think its stupid. You are a snooty person, get over it gothling)
moving on.
My point on this blog is to really stress that the SCARIEST looking people are often the nicest people you will meet.
Through pain and suffering we find peace. right?
I have a friend who is like 6'5" and has dreads down to his ass, and piercings, and frankenstein tattoos. And he is constantly getting looked at like a monster. People are scared of him. NOBODY looks at his face, he has the kindest face and the silliest personality. He cracks jokes 99% of the time. He is quiet and gentle.
Think about this. Big dogs always think they are small dogs, small dogs always think they are big dogs.
Its not HUMAN nature, its just nature.
I know it's hard to not judge people, I know we all do it everyday. But if we all made a conscious effort to not judge based on attire, appearance, sexual preference (and yes that even means fetishes, just because someone likes having the snot beat out of them does not make them a bad person, that shit is private), religious affiliation (remember we are all spirits having a human experience), or anything.
Take a minute to get to know the person. Take a day to get to know a person, don't just write them off.
You will regret it
its simple, just be aware.
Friday, April 12, 2013
Live together die alone
Ok I know that is from lost... I'm sort of addicted
3 years ago I thought my teaching career was shot. I was 18 years old and was holding a temp position Riverheads Elementary School teaching the art classes for each grade level. I was suppose to teach the second semester because the school budget only allowed enough money in the budget for one teacher to be spilt between two schools. The PTA at Riverheads raised the money to hire a temp (me) so their children could have art all year. I was stoked to have the position. Being an art teacher had been a long time wish for me (I have many life goals) and now I was given the chance. I had some teaching experience from mentor ships and working at a daycare after school. So the principle had no issue hiring me, except for my appearance. At the time in addition to having a shaves sides hairstyle, I also had some dreads and multiple facial Piercings. I agreed to hide my septum and take out my lip ring as well as wear wigs to work. It didn't seem like a big deal to me. However the president of the PTA was not thrilled with me, regardless of how much I was altering myself to have the opportunity. This parent begun to rally parents against me. When I went to get finger printed, she made a fuss about my attire. I
Believe i was wearing my large boots, and had all my piercings stilI in. I did not think it would matter at the point because I wasn't on the clock and I wouldn't be seeing anyone but the person finger printing me, but it was a problem. So a few days later she had the principle call me and warn me that I am a "teacher" now and that I need to act and look appropriate. Which I thought was extremely rude and out of line. I went out if my way to insure I'd look and act the part at work, and I went out of my way to get finger printed, and you have the ignorance to fuss about my attire? When I'm not even working for u yet?! So I got on Facebook, to tell my friends that I believe I had been targeted (again) just for being different. I explained what had happened in a post and put at the end a phrase me and my friends used frequently when we were upset. "Ass-fuck"
I started the following week. It was a series of bullshit from the start. First I spent a bunch of time off the clock organizing my room so I'd be ready. Then once I started teaching I was preached to daily, about one thing or another. One day the principal pulled me in the office to tell me they monitor what I look at on the classroom computer. They wanted to know what Vampire Freaks was. I explained that I use that site to stream music. I assured them I only use it during my planning period, while there are no kids in the room, and it's better than the radio. They let it slide but asked me to not use the computer for anything other than school. So I agreed. That was week two.
The next week was surreal. I could've sworn someone was following me. Home, to friends, out of town even! I couldn't shake the feeling. The 4th week we got a massive snow storm which caused out school to close for the following two weeks.
The Friday before returning to work I received a call from the PTA president telling me I was terminated because of my Facebook content. I argued that I wanted a more solid answer than that, so she told me I could come to the PTA meeting that week for a solid answer, and to collect my stuff and return the key.
Over the weekend parents were informed about my termination and my phone started to ring nonstop. A bunch of parents were outraged saying their kids loved me and had so much fun in my class! And that they would stand behind me and try to get me my position back at the PTA meeting.
When I got to the PTA meeting there were two tables. One which had parents who wanted me to stay and one with parents who wanted me gone it was about even. The meeting started slow, but before long, we were on the topic about me. The president of the PTA stood up and begin presenting photos of me from Facebook.
Saying that she doesn't have a Facebook and has no idea how to use Facebook but the photos were brought to her attention via email from other parents. She had pics of me at a club I go to, dancing. She had pics of me hanging out with my friends, and the only point she was making was that I looked scary. But what was really scary was that a few if the photos were not from my Facebook in fact I had never seen those photos in my life! So I spoke up. "How did you get those photos? Did you take them? If so why were you following me?" That made the room explode. People started arguing the two sides screaming at each other "your just a bunch of hicks!" "Yea well your a bunch of freaks!" I was quickly exported to a side room with the principal, vice principal, and president if the PTA. My father and my fathers GF came in the room with me. They sat me down and explained that the defining point wasn't the photos, it was a post I had made on Facebook about "anal sex" confused I asked to see the post, it was the post I had posted well over a month ago using the term "ass-fucked" I busted out laughing "are you serious?!?" They said they did not appreciate being referred to in that way, and putting it on FB was the equivalent to writing it on my classroom door. "I posted that over a month ago, who is combing through my Facebook? I post about 8 times a day on average, multiply that by 30 odd days. Someone was hunting!" The president instantly spoke up saying that she doesn't have a Facebook, and has no idea how to use it, that it was copy and pasted and sent to her via email." "Then how the hell do you know I actually said it?!" I had no idea why they were so quick to get rid of me over a post none of them had actually seen. Angry I grabbed my stuff and left.
That night I looked up the face books of the principal, the vice principal, and the PTA president. I was so hurt. They lied to me. I also found out it was the presidents husband who was following me around.
The local newspaper printed my story, emails and calls poured in for a while but eventually it just became old news.
Now all I want to do is find those people and tell them 1. I am still teaching and loving it 2. I hope all of them experience the hate and betrayal I felt, so they know what it feels like 3. And lastly I hope they grow from it. For everyone's sake.
I still think about their hate and their ignorance. I don't understand it. It still happens on a small scale now. I don't have as many Piercings or dreads anymore but it's obviously I'm not run of the mill. I still get outcasted regularly. The thing about teaching is that the children accept me, they are not scared of me. And I am a damn good teacher.
I found this in one of the books on the shelf in my classroom, and I love it and it inspired me to share my story.
It's from the story "new kid in town" by Claire freedman
"Come on everyone" said mouse. "Big wolf may look wild and scary, but it's not his fault he's hairy. And although his eyes are yellow, he's a friendly kind fellow!"
"Hmmm," said badger. "I suppose he's never really done anyone any harm."
"That's true," said giraffe,"maybe we should give him a chance!"
3 years ago I thought my teaching career was shot. I was 18 years old and was holding a temp position Riverheads Elementary School teaching the art classes for each grade level. I was suppose to teach the second semester because the school budget only allowed enough money in the budget for one teacher to be spilt between two schools. The PTA at Riverheads raised the money to hire a temp (me) so their children could have art all year. I was stoked to have the position. Being an art teacher had been a long time wish for me (I have many life goals) and now I was given the chance. I had some teaching experience from mentor ships and working at a daycare after school. So the principle had no issue hiring me, except for my appearance. At the time in addition to having a shaves sides hairstyle, I also had some dreads and multiple facial Piercings. I agreed to hide my septum and take out my lip ring as well as wear wigs to work. It didn't seem like a big deal to me. However the president of the PTA was not thrilled with me, regardless of how much I was altering myself to have the opportunity. This parent begun to rally parents against me. When I went to get finger printed, she made a fuss about my attire. I
Believe i was wearing my large boots, and had all my piercings stilI in. I did not think it would matter at the point because I wasn't on the clock and I wouldn't be seeing anyone but the person finger printing me, but it was a problem. So a few days later she had the principle call me and warn me that I am a "teacher" now and that I need to act and look appropriate. Which I thought was extremely rude and out of line. I went out if my way to insure I'd look and act the part at work, and I went out of my way to get finger printed, and you have the ignorance to fuss about my attire? When I'm not even working for u yet?! So I got on Facebook, to tell my friends that I believe I had been targeted (again) just for being different. I explained what had happened in a post and put at the end a phrase me and my friends used frequently when we were upset. "Ass-fuck"
I started the following week. It was a series of bullshit from the start. First I spent a bunch of time off the clock organizing my room so I'd be ready. Then once I started teaching I was preached to daily, about one thing or another. One day the principal pulled me in the office to tell me they monitor what I look at on the classroom computer. They wanted to know what Vampire Freaks was. I explained that I use that site to stream music. I assured them I only use it during my planning period, while there are no kids in the room, and it's better than the radio. They let it slide but asked me to not use the computer for anything other than school. So I agreed. That was week two.
The next week was surreal. I could've sworn someone was following me. Home, to friends, out of town even! I couldn't shake the feeling. The 4th week we got a massive snow storm which caused out school to close for the following two weeks.
The Friday before returning to work I received a call from the PTA president telling me I was terminated because of my Facebook content. I argued that I wanted a more solid answer than that, so she told me I could come to the PTA meeting that week for a solid answer, and to collect my stuff and return the key.
Over the weekend parents were informed about my termination and my phone started to ring nonstop. A bunch of parents were outraged saying their kids loved me and had so much fun in my class! And that they would stand behind me and try to get me my position back at the PTA meeting.
When I got to the PTA meeting there were two tables. One which had parents who wanted me to stay and one with parents who wanted me gone it was about even. The meeting started slow, but before long, we were on the topic about me. The president of the PTA stood up and begin presenting photos of me from Facebook.
Saying that she doesn't have a Facebook and has no idea how to use Facebook but the photos were brought to her attention via email from other parents. She had pics of me at a club I go to, dancing. She had pics of me hanging out with my friends, and the only point she was making was that I looked scary. But what was really scary was that a few if the photos were not from my Facebook in fact I had never seen those photos in my life! So I spoke up. "How did you get those photos? Did you take them? If so why were you following me?" That made the room explode. People started arguing the two sides screaming at each other "your just a bunch of hicks!" "Yea well your a bunch of freaks!" I was quickly exported to a side room with the principal, vice principal, and president if the PTA. My father and my fathers GF came in the room with me. They sat me down and explained that the defining point wasn't the photos, it was a post I had made on Facebook about "anal sex" confused I asked to see the post, it was the post I had posted well over a month ago using the term "ass-fucked" I busted out laughing "are you serious?!?" They said they did not appreciate being referred to in that way, and putting it on FB was the equivalent to writing it on my classroom door. "I posted that over a month ago, who is combing through my Facebook? I post about 8 times a day on average, multiply that by 30 odd days. Someone was hunting!" The president instantly spoke up saying that she doesn't have a Facebook, and has no idea how to use it, that it was copy and pasted and sent to her via email." "Then how the hell do you know I actually said it?!" I had no idea why they were so quick to get rid of me over a post none of them had actually seen. Angry I grabbed my stuff and left.
That night I looked up the face books of the principal, the vice principal, and the PTA president. I was so hurt. They lied to me. I also found out it was the presidents husband who was following me around.
The local newspaper printed my story, emails and calls poured in for a while but eventually it just became old news.
Now all I want to do is find those people and tell them 1. I am still teaching and loving it 2. I hope all of them experience the hate and betrayal I felt, so they know what it feels like 3. And lastly I hope they grow from it. For everyone's sake.
I still think about their hate and their ignorance. I don't understand it. It still happens on a small scale now. I don't have as many Piercings or dreads anymore but it's obviously I'm not run of the mill. I still get outcasted regularly. The thing about teaching is that the children accept me, they are not scared of me. And I am a damn good teacher.
I found this in one of the books on the shelf in my classroom, and I love it and it inspired me to share my story.
It's from the story "new kid in town" by Claire freedman
"Come on everyone" said mouse. "Big wolf may look wild and scary, but it's not his fault he's hairy. And although his eyes are yellow, he's a friendly kind fellow!"
"Hmmm," said badger. "I suppose he's never really done anyone any harm."
"That's true," said giraffe,"maybe we should give him a chance!"
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